It's not easy being REEN

Life in Hollywierd

Saturday, August 05, 2006

why they call it GREAT



Well, not often you see a whale jump out of the sea, and actually get a picture of it.

Here at the GREAT barrier reef, that's not the only magical thing...Phil, my lovely Marine Biologist, taught me all about the courting relationships in the sea, and they make us look really boring. Some species change gender, some change colors to attract the opposite sex, (I have a hard time changing clothes for a date)...hmmm....

The cool thing about the REEF is that it is the world's largest organism (yes, I said OR-GAN-ISM), and since each reef clones itself, it can not mate with itself so on a full moon all the different reefs release eggs and sperm at the same time and they all just magically find each other! It's like one huge LOVEFEST in the sea!

No wonder I feel funny on a full moon.

Don King?


What can I say?? I found the inspiration for Don King's look or maybe Tina Turner's...can't tell....

What do you think?

I HAVE TO DO WHAT????



Okay, I didn't ask to do this. In order to tell the sex of a Crocodile, one has to "sex the Croc," which means to stick my finger in a place no one wants a foreign object, and then feel for a ...well...a male part or a female part.... I found out it was a male.

I should have just asked it if it liked football or shopping- a much more dignified way to tell if was a man or woman....

I apologized for the therapy he will have to go through after that experience. And I set up a therapy appointment for myself when I get back to the States. I guess I can say I know what a crocodile feels like. I mean I REALLY know what it feels like.

Crocodile FUN-DEE


Well, learning about courting behavior with crocodiles was a real experience. The males actually take their time, blow bubbles, bump heads and take a few days to "get to know" the female before impregnating her. She lifts up her neck and has some king of glandular perfume, that she hopes he will like...BUT if you are a female and you take an interest in a male that does not find you attractive, he could kill you.

How's that for a painful rejection? I'd send a note first saying "dear croc, please place in X in the appropriate box":

1. I like you
2. I want to blow bubbles at you
3.You smell nice
4. Won't kill you, just not interested

Boy, I thought human courtship was dangerous!

Casso-WHAT??



Well you are gonna LOVE this bird, the Cassowary. Check this out: it lays its eggs and then takes off, leaving the father to incubate them and raise them. The ultimate Mr. Mom story. But wait, it gets better. She leaves him to hook up with as many males as she can, then sometimes comes back to the eggs she laid, only to EAT THEM!!!

So...just in case you ever thought you had a bad childhood, or your mom wasn't very nice...be grateful!! They also have one foot that has the CLAW of DEATH. It has a HUGE sharp knife-like shape and has been known to blugeon people when crossed . No wonder they have road signs all over to make people aware. This is a Bird you do not want to upset. Although when it comes to having kids, a woman who puts it all on the man... that's a nice change if you ask me :)

Land Down Unda


Well, it's time to check out more animals and their relationship behavior, and what better place than the land of kangaroos!
I am on a mission this time to learn about courting behavior, and parenting. I will be exploring Birds, koala's, kangaroo, and of course Crocodiles!!
And maybe find out what the heck a vegamite sandwich is......

How does one get to a BAT CAVE???


Once again, I could walk to the bat cave, but why walk when Ms. ADVENTURE can kayak???
It was a BEAUTIFUL river and although I took a mighty spill, I got right back on the kayak and continued the journey. Nothing can stop Ms. Adventure...BATCAVE OR BUST!!!

Holy vampire teeth batman!


This is a picture of me and my very first FAN!! If you look closely you can see it as AFTER I went into the Bat Cave...I think I may have been bitten...had been feeling a little strange....

This is my only picture of the bat experience, since there was no time for photos as I repelled into the bat cave only to land on toxic bat poo (called Guano) and flesh-eating beetles. And that was the EASY part.

We had to gear up and wear gas masks and cover ourselves completely. Then after we were dive bombed by the birds in the cave we went in deep to look at the group dynamics. These bats were called Brazilian free-tailed bats. I called them spooky-stinky-scary bats.

It seems the mothers hang out with the other mothers and the baby bats. Like a little bat baby shower. Speaking of shower, it felt like a shower in the cave, and I found out it was just a lovely rain storm of the bat pee. We found skeletons in the cave of creatures that should not have gone in there. I was beginning to feel like one of those creatures.

After a good 4 hours of exploring the toxic cave, I thought I had enough of bats for my lifetime, and ran into the river to wash off....

HOLY SCARY EXPERIENCE , BRAZILIAN FREE-TAILED BATMAN!!!!

MS. Adventure travel.....



The great thing about Ms. Adventure is that I don't just walk to my next adventure. I find interesting transportation...this time a VESPA.

And as you can see how major cool I look, I think I know what I want for Christmas....

God's Pad



Did I tell you I FINALLY found out where God lives??? In Carrillo Texas, apparently.

In a strip mall.

You would think she would have gotten something near the water or at least with a view. I do like the neon sign, though.

the secrets of BISON....


Well, it's off to Texas to check out group behavior in the Bison world. Hugh owns a huge ranch here and gets me an up-close-and-personal look at these huge creatures. The most interesting thing to me is that the buffalo behind me in this picture is an old one that left the group and sometimes hangs out with the other old Bison. Kinda like the "Bison retirement community." They wader off and slow down together in their old age. Play some bingo and have some ice tea. They do this because once you are not strong enough to be in the group, you either leave, or get kicked out.

In the younger groups, the guys hang with the guys, the females hang with the females. So there are cliques even with the Bison.

Hugh let me feed them from the back of his truck, and as they all were stampeding toward me I wondered if I would become part of the feed. Then I realized that might be fair, since after lunch Hugh let me know that the delicious steak I had consumed was actually one of the herd at some point. Nice to know now- as they are stampeding towards me wondering what I did with their cousin Bob.