It's not easy being REEN

Life in Hollywierd

Thursday, October 25, 2007


Well how could I see a trapeze and not want to fly through the air?? This was not as easy as it seems----it took an hour and a half class----but not a "taking notes class" you had to get up there right away and DO IT. Listen to the instructor every moment-----taking hold of the bar and jumping---having no choice but to trust the instructions being shouted and let go of the voices in my head ----I realized how much this activity was a metephor for my life right now----I had no time to process this move to atlanta--this new job and universe I am getting thrown into--the only way to survive the flight is to trust---to NOT listen to the voices in my head--but truly be in the moment----
On the trapeze I had a hard time when it came time to jump off the bar and let go into the net----the voices in my head kept saying 'DONT LET GO" but when I did not let go I stayed in the same place swinging aimlessly. When I finally let go the harness threw me into the air and effortlessly I did a flip and softly landed in the net.
The point of the class is it gets you ready for the final "catch" where you hold your arms out and let the professional grab you and take you off the bar into the air----
This process involves you holding out your arms after the swing but NOT GRABBING his hands-----your hands had to be OPEN and hold them out trusting he will grab them (by the wrist) and take you where you need to go. I held out my arms when the time came........BUT ]I tried to grab instead of holding my hands open and trusting him to take touched hands, but because of my need to grab instead of keeping my hands open and trusting-----we only touched and I continued to swing and flipped softly into the net---learning many, many things about what I need to work on in my life right now.

well---the FIRST thing I should be doing since we have already started filming the show-----I need a place to live in Atlanta!!
So instead of spending all weekend looking for a place---I decide to go with my friend Jeff and his kids to meet my best girlfriend shawna up in the mountains----camping at the infamous "leaf festival" up in ashville Noth Carolina-----a utopia of colorful leaves, mountains, sunshine, music, dancing, organic EVERYTHING, ...........and sleeping with 2000 of your closest friends in tents all across the colorful hills on the lake.....
It was INCREDIBLE. Tents full of people contra dancing (don't ask), poetry readings, bands, and even a group from a village in Rawanda performed their music and got into the audience dancing with all of a feeling I was stuck in a time warp in the 60's-----what other crazy thing could I do here? ........I had to ask.......